Lovely~

having so many ppl to wish me happy birthday and have 2 cake in the same day is the most happy n glad day that i had in my birthday~

thank q so much for giving me a surprise,u guy surprise me by coming from kampar to my house~ haha~ love u all.
thanks q for bring me to my bf house to had a celebration at his place which i havent done it before it will be a great xperience n memory that i will wanted to hav for this 2 year plus.

thanks q cybrcare for have the interview on my birthday,it make my birthday more memorable as we had a good interview n fun with our junior. it is the most special thing that i ever had.~ love u all so much~

闷

没你陪我我就快闷呆了啦~臭人！
你啊~你啊~
你知不知道人家没人陪的叻~
还不理下我，我就跑掉得咯~
臭人！！！！
才发现原来我只有你可以说话~别人我就好像会有个kek在哪~为什么会这样的呢？
我就不能像你一样和朋友谈天说大炮吗？
除了在学校有的说话，在家都好少有的聊哦~朋友都好像出了学校便不认识一样~
以前的朋友有出去才是朋友没出的就变淡了~
有的只是想你听他的故事，你就只能一直听没的说~到你说时你就能只有一句，他又继续说
还有个能说的又跑到那么远去做工~想说话都难~对啦~就是你！想死我了啦~
我还有很多东西要做的啊~为什么我在浪费我的时间在发呆呢？我应该在忙我的功课而不是在这打字写我的心声~
我知你忙~但女人是听觉动物~你就说“宝贝，今天我不能来哦~老公下次不会给你啦~” 那也就行啦~我就不会吵你啊~
我知道你累~你也可以“我好累哦~明天/我做完工程就来~” 这也行
只要你随时给通电话我说你在忙，或一封信息‘宝贝老婆，想你哦~’ 那有多难啊？
臭人~
为什么男生不了解女生？
为什么女生不了解男生？
完了~

intern intern

it was a very good and nice experience i had during this intern. i love this intern so much as it help me so much on knowing myself and the behavior on my limiting belief. haha.. but when time go on i feel that stress coming up as our pm are getting pushing ad..... PM pls Do be Calm As we Really Do our thing in the best we can...i love u are so much as we go for no expectation on something. the result that come out will be so perfect and nice. it is real because when u expected the thing to be like this it wont go for that way as we had expect something.  i'll post up all the picture as we were all so good in everything that we work play work play work play.. wahahaha... nice combination of team we had.

答应

房祖名的答应

好好听哦~ 讲着一段恋情即将开始~

喜欢看着你说话的样子

觉得你像个孩子

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

但有些话很难说出口

所以写了这首歌只为你

雨天答应晴天 所以天空放晴

电磁答应时间 不让手表暂停

月亮答应星星 永远不分离

一段恋情即将要开花是就会有这种感觉的吗？

嗯~是会有的

是在男生还是女生的思想里发生呢？

两方面都会有

这种感觉是最甜蜜的吗？

对

如何甜蜜呢？

当你即将要开始恋爱时，你就会发现你对他的所有都会在意，和变得自私时~

 当你觉得他变得像个小孩子，只要一通电话是他打来的你就会很开心~

这时才发现原来我爱上了你~需要主动的~不管是男的或女的都可以主动的开动~

觉得很难说出口时~就用这首歌来表达你对他的感觉

人与人之间能相识已经是很难了~能够成为好的朋友更难~有了暧昧~那就该行动~别等到那时机过了才出动~

We will meet around few hundred people a day just a stranger, to become a friend that is in the same line with us is a very hard thing although it seems to be easy~it is not easy to meet the people that is in the same line with us. As it had come dun waste or hesitate to go for it and say it out that u have a feeling to her or him as it is also a opportunity to know whether he or she had the same feeling on u. If yes, HURRAY u sucess! if no, Hurray u can find another that better than him or her. 

That is lot of way we interpret our thinking as we think negative,we will go negative vice versa.

Every information that we get is reflecting our current behavior,not the past not the future, is NOW. ( Sharmini,2010) 

We can live without other as we need to love ourselves before we can love other. if we do not love ourselves  how we can aspect other to love you?

Do you know that we will become fat is because we are lack of protection and self safe in our unconscious mind? what i learn from the book by Loius Hay, title I Can Heal My Life.

Give with no expectation we will get a very good reward back.

两个月的假期~

cut hair,
fyp
eat
sleep till afternoon
sleep late at night
play fb sdo blog msn
free everyday
cook
tidy
go here n there
call hubby every night
wait for result
still got 2 day need to go back to original school time lu
haha...><
i wan get AAAAA
haha

心情

我已从昨晚不开心到今晚啦
还不够吗？
不够，你知道吗？
你的一举一动一言一语对我来说都是很敏感的，
我会因为这而生气，伤心。你定又觉得我在耍脾气
其实你知道吗？你说的每句话对我来说都很重要，因为我会需要你的安慰和爱护还有关心。
我要的不是你的每句在说别人的不好因为他弄生气我而是你的一句：‘没关系啦，他是这样的，别气啦疼回” 这样就好。 为什么每次和你说时你都会用哪种很肯定的话说他是这样的啦、都和你说的啦、他就是这样蛮不讲理得咯！ 你这话什么意思哦！你知道吗？那时我和你说时你也用这种气话来敷衍我~我是真的被气得哭了好久~因为我被两个我爱的人气到啊！一个反口，一个就在那说气话！这是我最讨厌的东西！ 我讨厌你敷衍我！我讨厌你带刺的话！我讨厌你一副很懂很了解的语气！

写在这有屁用~和他说啊~说了又有屁用~他肯改才行啊~

再下去我就会什么都不说便会你刚认识我的嗯哦啊嗯哦啊的我~除了这三个字~我什么都不想说了~因为你也帮不到我~说了等于没说~

记得

谁还记得是谁先说永远的爱我

以前的一句话是我们以后的伤口

过了太久 没人记得当初那些温柔

我和你手牵手说要一起走到最后

这首歌好好听哦~阿妹~我爱你
记得
我们的记忆是会把我们不喜欢的不想想的洗掉吗？
其实不会他只把它收起来不想让我们在想
所谓的忘记其实自是我们的不留意并非忘记
如果有天我和你的爱情开始变化的时候
你是否还会记得我和你手牵手一起走到最后
现在的你我还是记得的~你每句你每个动作但久了我还会记得吗？
我记得我和你走了两年
但时间说真话时我害怕失去你
天黑了我就会失去你
那时你会记得何时爱情开始变化的时候
天空也会有不一样的彩虹
谁还会记得当初那些温柔

我的他

哈哈~来说说我的他吧~
谢谢你为了我的付出~我会好好的珍惜你的~我是个粗神经的女人啊~想说什么就说，当然只对你会才会这样因为你给到我别人给不到的~
我和六七个男人交往过~每一个可以比得上你的好，当然爱情是不能做比较。可是我还是相比比麽~因为也有可能是我的关系才会把以前的恋情都搞扎了~我以前什么都不会说出口，而且还有点怕男人，只有你我不怕还很自然的在你面前表现我的真面目。我也不懂为什么你能让我这么的自然和轻松快乐~和你一起我觉得很自在而且我和你已经两年半了哦~虽然中间又分开过三个月因为我有了一个新欢~但你还是在后面慢慢的监视我~不让我受伤~在那三个月我如一只狗都不如~那男的是个很大男人的人而且很暴力但他从没伤我~他会做出一些你完全只能在电视上看的到的东西~和他分手后~你不但没骂我没讨厌我还帮我~之后复合你也不会生气我~还抱了我好久~那晚是我完全崩溃的晚上~在你怀里哭了好久好久~因为我生气我自己伤了你也伤了自己~对不起~
我生病你是一话不说就来找我带我去看医生，我经痛你也会这么做~睡觉是会抱着我知道我睡了你依然抱着，我问你为什么，你既然说舒服咯，抱你很舒服~  ==///
你也从没骂我但终是会说我，我有时会生气是因为你总是不说出你的问题和烦恼给我听~和你说时你总会说不要你为我担心和烦恼~在一起是要快乐和自在，开心就好~你好久没给我惊喜了啦~每年的情人节一年加一朵哦~这就知道我们一起有几久了哈哈~我会上进你也要比我更上进哦~不然就不要你~因为你就会变得一个什么都不会的叔叔~我们的年龄距离宽，你大我好多，很多人都反对，尤其是我家人因为没可能一个离婚的能和我一起，我眼睛生在哪哦? 但我就是要和他一起因为我找不到第二个像他那性格的人了。

我爱你

宁

恋人未满

还记得以前市怎认识你的~不知你还记得吗？
我们是透过我弟的电话里的号码，他朋友把电话给你们这班人的~
然后你第一封是‘我们可以做个朋友吗？’我问你如何拿到我的电话 你说天跌了张纸下来
之后我们每晚都会传信息。
不知何时开始就习惯了和你传信息的日子，每晚都会由一句‘在做什么’开始到睡觉，有时还会传到一半睡着了突然吓醒再回传给你~ 有天突然和你说‘我喜欢你请和我交往吧’ 你既然傻了眼会我‘我一下不懂该和你说什么好’就这样结束了但这未结束我们每晚的信息，我们还是照常的信息但不一样的是你对我细心了~就这样我们见面的次数十根手指都数得完~但那感觉是比任何一个恋人更投入和爱护~
直到有一天你不在和我信息了~我找你但你都没回我~我真的快担心死了~但当时我真的太笨了~不会去问你的朋友，之后才知道你和牛做工了。查回之前你传给我的信息，既然发现你有次传来的不是什么祝福语而是你的表白，我既然笨到没看就按掉了~笨蛋的我~ 我还记得你写的是‘原来日久真的会生情，我真的喜欢上你了，好想把你收起来不被别人拿走。’ 但是我看到时已经有了牛就是你的好朋友。
但那是我真的不会谈恋爱因为我和你都是信息多很少谈电话，还记得有次你喝醉了和我说了一堆有的没得好好笑哦~但那天我真的好开心因为你和我谈了很久~你最后一句说‘你也很会说话啊~不会静啊’ 我说‘和你而已’
之后我有了牛，你和我说他是个很好的男人；但你知到吗，当我看到你时我真的有点吓到因为原来你在他那做工，但为何不和我说 ，我知道他是好男人但这句话然我心好疼好疼，因为是你，当时我好想和你说你知道我找了你好久好久嘛？为什么不回我？为什么不睬我？为什么？当时我怕男人所以什么都没说~就只和你笑笑带过。好辛苦啊~
直到去年和你喝茶，发现你胖了哦~好好哦~我也换了好几个男朋友~和他也没了因为他说我一脚踏两船~不知那个废柴乱说话，而当时的我并不会表达所以就一刀两断。
然后没多久就听到我朋友说你有了女朋友，还是我朋友来的，我听了心还是好酸好酸的，好想大哭一场，但我长大了没什么好哭的就算啦。

祝福你（国强）可以和你心爱的白头到老，子孙满堂。（好老派哦—）结婚不清我就掐死你！

暗恋你的宁

DUn noe

i so bored ah... i done a thing that seen a long time i dint do. that is cut my hair short till i cant believe it and it will like when my primary standard one hair so short but that time shorter. hehe... the second thing i do is i go shopping till i buy up to 100++ thing in Elianto...walao i cnt believe it.... haha... but nvm is my thing that i lik and after all the hard working i should buy something to pamper my self.  oh well i doing the same thing this few week. wake late than the sun shine in the middle sleep when the moon half sleep. wake up breaksfat then sit in front of the pc play game play fb watch stupid show... hahahaha funny show laugh die me. but i dint go out except with my mum
but i wish to go out with him lo... miss die u~ haha..

finish... wat a day. giv u see my photo...

Bla~~~i frustated!!!!!! totally!!!!!!!!!

Haha... quiet a long time dint update blog d... busying with my intern work so much... so many thing need to do especially fund raising is on the way.. make me more n more work... other... haiz... need to settle quiet a lot of thing by just doing by myself ! quiet frustrated... nvm~ i still can do the best i can so that we still get the  SAME GRADE although i n jun do the most! 
 it will be nice if u all can volunteer come n search or ask for work. and u all know what u need to do already but wat are u all doing. it suppose had lot lot lot lot of work starting this week. lot of thing that i need to do u can come n ask.. not just only doing the flower n box and ribbon. those is second important thing lo.....haiz......
i still enjoy the work and sometime i still like to mumble here cause i really need support also... the most important thing now is sponsorship!!!!!!! haiz...... wat thing u need to do in the office wo! 

New Experience

A day for a good experience and lesson.
Today June 10, 2010, is the day where me n my group went to the coaching session where we will attend every Thursday from 11 to 4pm. Although it is tired n exhausted, it is a good time to study and learn what human and personal development.
We start our journey at 6a.m, for me I need to wake at 5a.m cause I depart from my hometown which it need 30minute to reach Kampar. As I was about to arrive, one of my member send me message and say ‘I need 15 minute to prepare as I just wake up.’ As I was still in the way of arrive so I just take my time and travel in a safe mode.
When I arrive I found that one of our members had fall sick as food poisoning. Then our team leader just wake as I reach the place. So at last we depart late again on 6:30a.m. The 1st day we depart at 7a.m now improve 6:30a.m. Good
As we arrive, we had been coach by Ms Shamini, our coach that guides us as our live skill coach and Mr Cheong guide our progress. It was a good experience as we learn trough listening and briefing as talk coach talk coach. After that Ms surprise us with a task of “ now I have a good news and a bad news” the good news is you all be coaching my children that will be coming to my community café later and the bad news is we are not going to the garden today. So you all need to coach my children. The objective is easy just let them learn a lesson in English today.
My leader was like totally shock when he receives the message, 1 of the member and I was excited n high as we going to play with the kids. Wuhu~~~~~~~ so happy as I was about to conduct a game or help them to learn. The kids are mostly from lower primary and some of them cannot speak well English.
We among ourselves discuss n discuss n discuss as nothing work. While one of our team members that talk less became so talkative this is because he is so nervous as it express out through talk. So funny…
Everything happens for a reason. Every experience makes a person move forward. Everything do happen for a reason, no why this thing happen to me why not other? Why? By thinking like this it will not make the person go forward as it just will make people go backward. How the experiences make you to move forward? Not how is by what. What you can learn to make this to become true?

My life Line

Haha...hi hi, this will be the 1st time i write blogs. I'm Elaine Phua from Langkap. Langkap is a small village from the state of Perak. I born in Hospital Besar Seremban. From 0 to 3 i been take care by my grand n aunt. My parent went oversea where call Papua New Guinea, a place where most the resident is black skin ppl n the place is quite dangerous.
          When i was 3 i went there to stay with my parent where i go study for kindergarten also. My mum tell me that the 1st time i talk i was actually talking hokkien with the English ppl...ha-ha so funny... but i dun have much of the memories.I just remember that there was a water bed in our house a lot of dogs n puppies n delicious coconut, mum cook Asian dishes for me lik nasi lemak roti canai banana cake other i cant get back the memories. I think i went to Hong Kong as well where i got visit ocean park n Macau. In the ocean park i get a photo of me made in to a key chain as a souvenir n i was playing banana boat at 3 years old i think.I was totally shock at that time which still a phobia to me till now but i had overcome it.Haha...
After that i was send back from there to study my kindergarten at Seremban then before this i was having my kindergarten in PNG but then dun noe y papamama send me back to M'sia. Everyday my grandpa will send me to my kindergarten by motor. so dangerous...haha...kids with no parent in side is like this de lo...In the kindergarten i always get bully by a boy...but i dint tell my grandparent but after that teacher found out n the ms just canned the boy. He used to pinch me beat me n i always get the bruise.
             It was mother's day on the time in kindergarten n ms made a carnation paper flower for each of us as a give to mum, but for me my mum was still outside of the country how am i going to send the flower to her as i was still a small n unacknowledged child. So i just put the flower at the top of the stair. I think i say to my grandpa i wan to give it to mama when mama come back...still can feel the heartbreak of me when writing this... it feel so helpless when mama papa not around. The last thing i remember the carnation is my grandpa ask me to throw it but i was refusing but dunno how the carnation seems gone. So the flower was throw to the bins before i get it for my mama
         After that, i remember that once, i gave ma a a give that dunno where i pick it up n just wrap with a calendar paper n just give her. i feel so happy at that time cause i gave something to my mama. another thing is that i was so naughty that i play in around the motorcycle and when i want to come down i fall n i hurt my leg... it leave a 1 to 2 inch of scar till now..
        After that mama n papa came back n stay in M'sia to work. My mum told me that the primary school teacher always complaint about the cleanliness n tidiness of my school uniform. After this not much memory can i caught back ad...i think it just went trough normally.
         We move to Klang i study for 6 year there for my primary then to Langkap.it was a new place for me in Langkap. what a small town. when me and my family 1st came to Langkap, the food was completely sooooooooo cheap than in Klang until we are so shock when we heard the price.
         My new life from here as new place new situation new air,like the twilight d actress haha...so then, i start my secondary in a school call Dato'Sagor a school where contain a lot of different people and i still dun noe how to deal with them. for the 1st day we just simply been separate to a classroom before we can start school. as i get in to a class where i mix with a after pre secondary d student which is mine senior. they seems good n nice to me as the girl chat with me quiet a long time asking me y i change class to here y no stay at kl...... then after all been separate in class they were few of us cant been call up the name as we are come from different place d school d student change to here. Then the principle say that i dun have the verify paper that saying that i have the authority to sate in this school i was shock n started to cry. after that i been give to a class where there are mostly naughty student go and pre-secondary school student stay.
        Then i saw the girl again as she told me that i sit here dun sit there. As i still so naif,i just follow the order of the teacher then the girl say change then the teacher also no say anything. then i just change to the place she say.then after one week i change to the second class is from 1A1 to 1A2 a class where i meet another bunch of student that is naughty, there i still be a good girl.
         Then after 3 day i change to a class 1A8 the class where i find all my friend from then till now. from the girl that take me to the class was now my best ever friend Mei Jean. haha...we two was still funny with this as how we noe each other as we had make a line tight up when u take me to my class. from there start with mixing with malay as i dun noe how to mix. then come two chinese gal asking wat ur name? that is Chia Yee and Pei Ying. if i no mistaken. form then we play n play,study. and chaos one day then friend back again..haha... until we change class it become a distant and it stop.
        It still there,become lesser. then mix and mix friend become more but no long distant friendship.until form 3 end i noe a guy from the phone. his name is O.D. he is a cute guy as dun noe y that goes my puppy love with him. then after that he change saying wan to break as he need to go sabah n work. i was lik so hurt so hurt until a half day i finally go ok.then i just accept lo. then i change a few phone lover..so naif(==_) after that i meet with nam yinn that we will go long kai everyday.haha dunnoe for wat...haha... then nonstop talk with her.
       Then meet with other  in form 4 and 5. play play fun fun laugh laugh till dunnoe the time n day. wahahaha, nice form 4 and 5. haha. after that come a guy call nick. dunnoe for wat attract me and my best friend ting. now we are just a stranger that noe but no talking. he is they one who ruin my life or can say i make him come in and ruin my life. wat a stupid i am. it make an exprience for me that time is man only wan is sex no other.
He will make me to go his house to do something for him as once i lik to go to his house as the smell attract me and the hug he give me. i still can remember as that time i was helping him to press his pimple out then play till lik he is up me using his chin to tickle me in my face then he stop and look at me then he become closer and closer to kiss me. i was lik turn here and there as i dun wan to let him to kiss me. he just force me to stay still by making me no space to turn(==_) then i just been kiss n kiss n kiss... dunnoe for wat..>< so terrible. then i came n came again for more n more.   i think i stop here. i need to have some of the flash back so that i can continue from small to i meet him.

Just awake from yesterday till now....haha...wat a good night to sleep. but i cry before i go in to my dream. u had made me miss u so much in my life. but it just one week away from our gathering but it like one month for me ad. but u seem like u dun have the feel on it but u can feel my missing. i need to be understanding so that i can feel u too... maybe.. y is it hard when someone u love go for outstation for work n other just for a few day, start feeling the miss even though just for few hour just he left.i miss u dear do u get me??

bro bro

today was my half moody day i think cause i wake up so early in the morning then had breakfast. then i feel great. it was a good family day.Haha cause we go for my little bro final competition of badminton. when it was his turn to play i feel so proud n nervous as he playing... my papa n mama n my bro laugh at me cause it like i'm playing not my little bro who play...haha cute me... then i took a picture of him n his double match player. the most right is my little bro n the orange color is they final competitor. it was so amazing that my bro skill n technique was so nice n strong. feel so happy to him n proud too. haha... after that we when to jusco... the most crowded place haha.. cause almost new year.... but i dint buy any thing at all...so sad... i wan to wait my hubby to come back n go shop with him....haha...then i can wear the thing that he buy haha.... miss him sooooo much..... almost like 2 month dint see him but it just 3 week time only...cause every week he will come n accompany me on my free time so it make me so uneasy on everything ...after all the grocery thing that had brought we when back lu.. wat a tired day... haha nice. enjoy the day guys

Bad

wat a bad luck today....need to duty but lucky nothing to do...but it was so tired n sleepy lucky got ppl to talk with...haha.... the bad luck happen when i cant start my car...... =,= battery kong ad.....mean no more battery..haha. then i just call my papa then my papa say then how?? i think la...wait... then i just make my thing by calling my service center to ask them to send a person to fix it...then nvm.... it was a little piny rain when i come out... then after the technician come n wanted to change the battery the rain become so big until all of us need to wait in the car...then later the technician person say he need to go back 1st then later he come again. ok then.. after that nvm... i just let tem to tumpang me back so i not need to walk back with my friends... then after reach home i bath cook haha....nice dinner then my mum told me that my papa scold my mama. wat la... haiz.... family problem... private sorry..haha then after the rain stop i just call him to fix my car. it take only 15 minute to fix it n it cost rm200.... haiz...i already poor...plus this lagi poor..... car pls love me as i love u.....bye..

wat a day

1st day at my IA( internship) haha... wake at 7 do some washing bathing n brushing n make up- ing already 9:15 am...haha.. i'm so slow motion. i go with my bf last Saturday to Seberang Prai at Bukit Mertajam. haha.. nice place in a big rushing city there was a quiet small village live a bunch of ppl where they children mostly are big school graduated students. hmm..... i wonder...... but it to admit that the place was quiet big and very nice place. the plantation was tidy n neat. they have a garden where it was nice simple n clean n nice. i like that place that have this things. i like environment maybe.
ha.. ya wat i do in my 1st day of my intern?
I was ther around 9:45 then i wait wait wait then chat chat with friend same intern place with me. then we start our intern at 10:15 with coach by Mei Yen until 11: 45 then we ask ask ask ask ask ask ask then after all settle we get together n have a photo shooting ... then wala..... finish work at 12: 15pm. hahaha... wat a day...
good thing is i enter the right place...haha

wala..

i have been i my house for like one week and i dint go out at all.... wahahahah.... but i did go for buy thing and make payment lo...then what am i doing in this one week? hahaha... i cook clean play play play then FYPFYPFYP final year project as we need to finish on time .
Wat a day.... nothing happen to me in this day ... haha...just a calm sea out there... no one is gossiping about me in my parent ear's. that is a good thing for me... but i will feel so bored as I CANT ONLINE in my house until today..... wala days..... hahaha.. but it fine with me cause i'm not too addicted to net but to facebook i'm addicted. without facebook i will feel i'm going slow with those who are playing in the facebook. i dint play game in the facebook but wat i do is chatting comment and lik hahahaha. that all for now.. i will continue de.. some day some place