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Tuesday, October 30, 2012

life

this, how many 10 years you had. make it clear. be happy and get what you wan. dun regret. i wont regret on everything i wan to do and the one i had choose. pls i beg u, u dun beg me pls, just take it despite the happiness of you child.

everythng happen for a reason


i believe everything happen for a reason.

what i had done i should bare the consequence.

this time it will b a big wan as what i want i will get it and i will.

most of the time ppl just see the surface of the person and if u dunnoe him by looking the past of him and look of him u will say, what the fuck u wan to b with this idiot?

ya, i m rude.

yes he is this kind of look that been given to you guy. his past n look. pls do get along with him and noe him like i do to make sure u are not judging it by it cover. i will proof it that what u guys do is wrong, and i will b the last to win. but what i wish for is a win win situation not a one win one lose.

sometime i wish i just could run away and let u both lose the war. i m not going to go that way unless u force me to the wall and make me do it.

what u guys do is listen those ppl who is black hearten talk bad bout him. why? how bad is him?? where he is a super caring n soft guy i ever meet? how not loving is him? where he take care of the family until work till he get so tired at night? how not responsible of him? where he take care of the family inside out and protective of the family. how bad will he b? i wonder?

did you noe y he was divorce? because he ad give up for his wife who is not loyalty, not filial piety, not care for the family and children.

y i say so?
A housewife who give birth for 3 beautiful child, this eldest get abuse when she was small, the second get sick due to lack of taking care her and make her a water pail to play for few hour and almost die cause of her lack alert and till the next day only she go tell her in-laws, make the youngest been spoil and bad temper? this is a good mum ya? not doing any house chores let the mother in law do everything and having TNMJP,TNYMGJB,TN,and make the children learn those word. when the mother in law got stroke due to her who cause this, she went for work and leave the mother in law in house alone for 3 years. and said the mother in law, this is your time, this time you are died, noe how to eat duno how to do. this time you are finish. tell me how good this women is?tell me
when divorce, the mental stress that she done almost get the whole family go n suicide especially him, did u guys noe that, u don no.
during court time, did you noe what the wife tell the judge, the judge ask the wife, why u dun wan to take the children? you have the priority to have them y u choose not to?
do you wan to noe the answer of the wife? she say want it for what, disturb my way and blocking it. (oi le zuo mak yet? tou suo lam giok) in cantonese if u get what i means. this is a good woman?
  
i m clear with everything, as u noe everything i do is sometime is so stubborn till i hurt u, this guy make it and 4 year we been together. i was as happy as an angel. who noe that? all of my friend had eye, and they can proof it.

i noe you guys, status is more important than me, i wish to sacrifice my selves and can i say a word to you?

u had lose a son lose a daughter because of your stubbornness on the status and face, is it so important of the face and status than the happiness of your children? tell me?
i am not doing anything unmoral,  moral is respect is ppl who gave you, not yourselves who decide it. do you not face is ppl who gave, status is thrown by ur selves.

did you noe the most been hurt, is not u both, is me and you sons. u thought everything u do is the best for us, but did you ask did u take agreement from us on what we want what we wish for? you dint. you dint......









Monday, October 22, 2012

THANK YOU. AND EXPLAINATION.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I HAD MARRY AND MY MARRIED WILL B A NOT HAPPY ENDING MARRIED.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I M AD A MUM OF A 3 OR MAYB 4 YEARS OLD SON OR GAL.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I AD A VERY CHEAP SLUT THAT HAVING ons  EVERY WEEK WITH SOMEONE I DUN NO.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, MY LIFE IS SO MISERABLE.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I WONT NOE WHAT IS SAFE IN THE ARM OF YOUR LOVE ONE.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I BEEN DRAG AND ABUSE BY SOMEONE IN THE PAST.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I WONT SO HAPPY LIKE FOR NOW AND THE PAST 4 YEARS

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I HAD BEEN THROW OUT OF SCHOOL DUE TO DRUG ABUSE AND ABSENT TO SCHOOL DUE TO PUB EVERY NIGHT.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I DINT NOE THAT LOVING SOMEONE IS SO WONDERFUL.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I DINT NOE THAT THE SOCIETY HERE IS SOOOOO STEREOTYPE ON WHAT HIS PAST WAS.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I WONT NOE THAT AGE RANGE IS NOT A PROBLEM IN A RELATIONSHIP.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I DINT NOE THAT BOTH OF MY BROTHER SOOO LOVE ME, AND CARE FOR ME.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I DINT NOE THAT MY FAMILY IS SO CONSERVATIVE ON CHOOSING THEIR IDEAL SON IN LAW

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I DINT NOE THAT MY TEMPER IS SO BAD THAT I ONLY CAN HAD IT ON HIM

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, EVERY BIRTHDAY I WILL JUST HAD CELEBRATE WITH FRIEND AND FAMILY

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I WONT B HAVING WHAT I HAVE TODAY.

IF I DUN HAVE HIM, I HAD BEEN DIED FOR AT LEAST 4 YEARS AGO.

I AM SORRY TO THOSE WHO SAID HE IS NOT A GOOD GUYS AS HE IS A DIVORCEE. PLS PLSSSSSS!!!!! DUN SAY HE BAD BUT USE YOUR STEREOTYPE EYE AND SEE CAREFULLY ON HOW HE TREAT ME ONLY U TELL ME, IS HE WORTH IT TO BE STEREOTYPE OR NOT!

  YES, HE IS A DIVORCEE FOR 5 YEAR PLUS. AND WE HAD BEEN TOGETHER FOR 4 YEARS. IN THIS 4 YEAR OUR LOVE JUST GROW NO DECLINE. Y? NOT BECAUSE WANT TO SHOW YOU GUYS THAT WE CAN MAKE TO THIS WAY JUST TO LET U GUUYS TO DROP YOUR GLASSES, BUT IN THE PERIOD THAT WE BEEN TOGETHER, NO HURT JUST JOY AND LOVE. HURT IS FROM YOU ALLS STEOREOTYPE EYES THAT SAYING A DIVORCEE IS A NO NO GOOD GUYS. Y NOT GOOD TELL ME? A GUY THAT WILL LET HAVE TO BE THAT NATURAL NO COVER U, A PERSON WHO CARE FOR YOU SO MUCH AND WORRY LIKE HELL WHEN SOMETHING HAPPEN TO YOU EVEN IT IS A SMALL THING LIKE PERIOD PAIN? THAT IS A NOT GOOD GUY?

HE TEACH ME TO BE SELF LOVE, BUT WHAT I DO IS JUST HURTING MYSELF THAN LOVE MY SELVES BEFORE THIS, YOU WANNA NOE Y? BECAUSE I DUN NO WHAT IS LOVE I THOUGHT GIVING SEX TO THE GUYS THAT WILL MEANS LOVE. I AM NOT A VIRGIN START 17 PLUS, Y? I M A CURIOUS GAL THAT RUN HERE AND THERE AND A LOVE SEEKER!Y? FROM I WAS A LITTLE GAL I BEEN ALONE AND THE LOVE FROM NOT YOUR PARENTS IS REALLY A K-YOS, LACK OF LOVE FOR A CHILDREN AND EVERY BLAME NOT MAKE BY ME IS COUNT ON ME?  THAT MAKE MY LIFE SO MISERABLE. I M NOT HERE TO BLAME OTHER BUT WHAT MY LIFE IS NOW IS BECAUSE OF MY PAST AND I STILL CANT LET IT GO AS I AM SOOOO DEEEPLY HURT  BY UR ACTION. NOT MY PARENT BUT MY CARETAKER, EXCEPT MY BIG AUNTY~ SHE IS STRICT BUT U LOVE ME FROM INSIDE, AUNTY, AND I NOE THAT.

Y MUST A SINGLE ONLY CAN BE A GOOD GUYS BUT A DIVORCEE CANT? GIVE ME THE ANSWER PLS? I DUN UNDERSTAND THIS, I M SORRY. MY LOVE LIFE IS SIMPLE, FOR THE ONE WHO REALLY BEEN GOOD TO ME, HE WILL BE THE ONE WHO WILL BE WITH ME FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.

WHAT YOU TELL ME, I WONT CHANGE IT, AS HE IS BETTER THAN YOUR HUSBAND AND I CAN GUARANTY THAT. DUN THINK THAT HE WILL CHEAP ME PLS.

IF WHAT U WAN IS WHETHER HE HAD PROPERTY OR NOT, YES, HE HAD, NOT MUCH, ABOUT A MILLION ONLY. AND IT IS IN MY HAND, Y SHOULD U WORRY BOUT THAT?

WHAT I CARE ABOUT IS JUST HOW HE TREAT ME, NOT PROPERTY. MONEY CAN BE EARN, BUT THE CHOICE YOU HAD FOR YOUR OTHER HALF. PLS BE CLEAR AND MAKE SURE HE IS THE ONE THAT CAN HAD FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, IF YOU ARE NOT HAPPY WITH HIM AND ARGUE FOR SOMETHING SMALL, HALO, PLS RETHINK AND ASK YOURSELVES, IS HIM THAT ONE?

I AM SURE THAT HE IS THE ONE FOR ME.
I HAD SEEN HIS FAMILY, HIS RELATIVE, HIS FRIEND, AND EVERY PERSON THAT HE NOE, IF HE TREAT ME UNWELL THEIR SURE WILL GIVE ME SIGNAL FOR LEAVING HIM, BUT UNTIL NOW NO ONE HAD DONE THAT.

Y HE DIVORCE? DIVORCE IS NOT BECAUSE OF BOTH HAD DONE A BIG WRONG THAT CANT BE TAKE BACK, BUT IS BOTH ALREADY CANT WALK DOWN TOGETHER FOR THE HALF OF THE ROAD.

HE WANNA CHEAT MY MONEY AND MY PET?

OK, MY PET IS SOOOO CHEAP THAT I HAD 6 PERSON TRY IT~!

OK WANNA CHEAT MY MONEY, WHAT I HAD IS ONLY -150,000.00 IN THE BANK. NOT MUCH. 

WHO NOE? MY MUM DINT TELL AND MAKING HER SELVES LIKE SHE THE MOST POOR THING IN THE WORLD AND LET YOU GUY THINK  THAT CHILDREN ARE THE ONE MAKING HER THAT WAY, BUT DID YOU NOE THAT SHE N HER GREAT HUSBAND WHO HAD THE LOAN AND NOT BECAUSE OF US?  THERE WAS A TIME SHE AND HER HUSBAND GO REFINANCE AND THAT TIME THEIR CAN CLEAR ALL THE DEBT, AND STILL HAVING SOME ABOUT 20K LEFT, AS I COUNT CLEAR ALL FOR THAT, DO YOU NOE WHAT THEY TELL ME? THEY SAY DUN USE TO PAY IT ALL KEEP IT. AND WHAT HAPPEN IS 6 MONTH ALL THE MONEY FROM LOANS FINISH. I AM SO ANGRY AND I CONFRONT THEM, Y? THERE A CHANCE TO CLEAR ALL YOU GUYS DUN DO IT AND KEEP IT TO CLEAR SLOWLY? I AM SO CURIOUS.PLS GUIDE ME

I AM  CHILDISH. PLS MY THINKING IS CHILDISH IS  BETTER THAT YOU GUYS WHO IS SOOOO CAPABLE IN ACTING. YOU CAN CRY IN A SUDDEN AND LAUGH ON THE OTHER SIDE. I AM NOT THAT KIND OF PERSON THAT HAVING 2 FACE. HOW CHILDISH I AM? CHOOSING A GUY THAT IS DIVORCEE IS A CHILDISH ACTION? BELIEVING IN HIM WONT CHEAT ME I S A CHILDISH ACTION>?

WHAT IS CHILDISH ACTUALLY, THAT I CAN LIVE MY SELVES, I CAN TAKE CARE OF MY BROTHER, I HAD TO CLEAR ALL THE DEBT EVERY MONTH AND LEFT NO MORE FOR MY 1 MONTH USAGE, I HAVING TO DRIVE HERE AND THERE ALL BY MY SELVES. I NEED TO BE INDEPENDENT,I CAN TAKE CARE MY SELVES,I NEED TO THINK ALL OVER ON THE ACTION I WAN TO DO.I AM CLEAR WITH MY MIND ON WHAT I WAN, WHEN MY PARENT STILL AROUND I AM AD LIKE THIS.THAT IS CHILDISH?
NOE WHAT IS RIGHT AND WHAT I WRONG IS CHILDISH? OK, HAVING A SOOO GODD GUYS THAT TREAT ME SOOO GOOD BUT IS A DIVORCEE IS A CHILDISH ACTION? I DUNNOE HOW TO EXPLAIN THAT..


CAN I HAVE SOME COMMENT WHAT SHOULD I DO~? I AM SO WAVE NOW~ I WAN A WIN WIN SITUATION~ IS IT SO HARD TO HAD IT?







Friday, October 12, 2012

Grad.

Finally I' M GRADUATED.... it feels like after exam i clear with the thing i wanna to do but it seems all need to be postpone as parent going out oversea to work. nvm... plan can change whenever thing do not turn well ya. as for me i m flexible enough i think as i was planning to become a teacher for full time, due to i need to take care of my bro i will had to make a change on having tuition instead of teaching in school.
well things still going good. ^^
what happen to me on my admitted to hospital?
haha, if i tell u u will feel funny bout me as i was going to my family doctor to had my minor minor surgery on the ingrown nail at my big toe. it does pain n look scary to me. but after everything had been done and the nurse had do the dressing well then the time i sit and doctor was about to write the medicine for me, i tell the doctor, i feel dizzy@@
Dr. ask me to lay down n the nurse gave me a cup of duno wat orange flavor drinks. then i feel better. after that i went out but Dr. insist i stay in the clinic for 10 minute and ask my parent to fetch me.
this is what happen when my parent came in i feel more n more dizzy till a stage that i start feel like vomiting and my eyesight gone. serious till i shock my Dr. then they start let me lay down and start pok me.... more pain....aisk...
Ta da~~~ finally have the time to type here~ wahahahaha
this year start it seems i am so busy to do so many thing, what i do is only~ sleep~~~wahahaha~
it had been 4 years since we together. it time to move on~ i will go confront my parent on accepting my choice on you and forever is u my choice. How he treat me i am the one who only noe. i do not need to show off at everyone how he treat me, how good is him, wan ppl come over him me. aiyo.CANNOT. he is mine and forever. sorry not available for you all...blek. ya, he is not good looking and has a big tummy, but he treat me better than who ever beside me.
i want to tell my parent but how i going to start the conversation leh.....>< bother me alot.
i should tell them how good he treat me? how he care for me? how he is when he is with me, and how is his personality is? haiz...
i wanna registered married next year d. without parent acknowledge is a no good way. let them noe they say no, i will still insist to go for him as i am the one who noe how good is him when we are together and how happy am i when we are together, ya sure there is some minor argument during this period but what it do is tie use more tide only.

Friday, October 5, 2012

2013520

it been sooooooo long i dint updated my post and for now i will type a day la...kakakaka.
it been 4 years since we are together. and it time to move forward a step.
so the 1st step i had to take is, tell  my parent, but how, i beeen thinking since i had decide to registered with him. haha.

i think i will just confront them and let them noe how he treat me and what he had done to me. i think i can type here and let them read~.till then, bsy busy~